I’m sitting in my apartment after 17 years of marriage. I sense the desire to change, and I can feel things are changing, perhaps on the margins, but I’m not sure real change is possible. I feel like my identity has vanished - ‘No one will want me.’ I can relate. You’ve given me some things to think about. Thanks so much.
I'm sorry you're going through this. You're in the same place I was. I assure you it is possible to come through it, and come out better than you've ever been. It won't happen overnight, and it will definitely take effort.
It’s as if I was pulling a wagon of shit through life and toted it into my marriage, never taking the time or effort to sift through everything. Now my wagon is heavier than ever. I’m peeking over the rail and pulling stuff out, gradually, so I might find peace in the future.
As long as you're aware and working on it, and not just drifting and letting yourself be carried away by whichever way the current flows, you can get there.
It’s striking how success, money, and achievement didn’t touch the belief formed much earlier. This feels like a reminder that the work of becoming often starts far before and far beneath, what the world can see.
It’s somewhat embarrassing to admit I was once where you are but 20+ years ago. Same situation, same thoughts. I spent a while exhausting my friends with my tales of woe. Then one kind friend told me to shut the F up and do something exciting. I was furious at first. Hurt and ashamed of listening to myself. Then I got my first passport and went to London and Paris. Suddenly I had some amazing stories to tell. No house. Just a rented studio. Now the whole world is my back yard. I have bought a house since but I still have the same desire to not spend time in it.
I’m sitting in my apartment after 17 years of marriage. I sense the desire to change, and I can feel things are changing, perhaps on the margins, but I’m not sure real change is possible. I feel like my identity has vanished - ‘No one will want me.’ I can relate. You’ve given me some things to think about. Thanks so much.
I'm sorry you're going through this. You're in the same place I was. I assure you it is possible to come through it, and come out better than you've ever been. It won't happen overnight, and it will definitely take effort.
Thank you for sharing that.
It’s as if I was pulling a wagon of shit through life and toted it into my marriage, never taking the time or effort to sift through everything. Now my wagon is heavier than ever. I’m peeking over the rail and pulling stuff out, gradually, so I might find peace in the future.
As long as you're aware and working on it, and not just drifting and letting yourself be carried away by whichever way the current flows, you can get there.
DM me if you'd like to chat.
It’s striking how success, money, and achievement didn’t touch the belief formed much earlier. This feels like a reminder that the work of becoming often starts far before and far beneath, what the world can see.
Imposter syndrome is a huge thing for many successful men.
Many carry childhood beliefs straight into adulthood, no matter how far they go.
Same gig for me. 24 years but landed in a shitty apartment. Fast forward 10 years...a ton changed Great read and relate so much
That's great to hear, man. Good for you.
It’s somewhat embarrassing to admit I was once where you are but 20+ years ago. Same situation, same thoughts. I spent a while exhausting my friends with my tales of woe. Then one kind friend told me to shut the F up and do something exciting. I was furious at first. Hurt and ashamed of listening to myself. Then I got my first passport and went to London and Paris. Suddenly I had some amazing stories to tell. No house. Just a rented studio. Now the whole world is my back yard. I have bought a house since but I still have the same desire to not spend time in it.
Bob, I freaking LOVE this.
Bravo, brother.